I hope all is well, I just want to update you on a few things.
Today is the SuperBowl, and even if you're not a fan of football (this is the biggest annual American sporting event) everyone, if not otherwise occupied, will be paying attention to the commercials. If you will be watching--post your favorite commercials from the game--I'm sure they'll be onthe Internet in a matter of minutes.
2. More site advancements will be on the way, but as mentioned before, when operating through a third party, you have limits.
3. Finally, as also mentioned before, I will be posting writing opportunities from time to time--here are two found on www.craigslist.org
Lots of people are incapable of explaining why they feel the way they do. Some are too afraid to express their feelings for the fact that maybe they dont want to hurt the other person, or even pursue anything at all because they are afraid of how things will turn out.
So some people just figure that you will read between the lines and know that romance will never begin, or for those in a relationship, they expect you to know the love is over...
While explanations can be helpful, they are never offered. Many loves end horribly or never get started, and no words help the pain or clear the confusion...
What about when someone likes you and you don't like them?.. Do you sit them down and tell them or do you go about your business and hope they get the message?
Silence is easy, but it's not always the best solution, that's why we need to figure out what we are saying even when we are not using words..
If you are the one who causes the pain, don't be too proud to admit you are wrong and apologize. It can bring you closer..
If you care for someone it's not worth staying mad and holding grudges.. Express your disappointment..talk it over..and move on..
If that's not the case, just remember that no answer is also an answer.
It usually means they don't care. Obviously to them.. the situation is not worth discussing and they feel you are not important enough to get an explanation..
I know I haven't posted anything in an eternity, but that is going to change this weekend. Anyway, I was in one of my classes the other day when we did an exercise. All of us in the class were partnered up, and my Professor wanted us to exchange a profound moment from our lives. I am a firm believer in the fact that everyone has their own story and always find myself curious about the lives of others. So, if you have some free time, and are willing, I would like to hear about some of the profound moments from your lives. As a community of writers, I think it would be great if we all had the opportunity to get to know each other better.
One good day you will look back and you will finally realize that what worries you, makes you cry and suffer today will only make you laugh, even make you feel ridiculous about the way you felt and acted in the past.
Everything in life comes to an end one day and you can finally get over anything.
The most important thing is not how, when and how high we fell, but knowing how to get up, shake it off and continue with more strength as life will put us through a lot more challenges and every day they will be even harder.
They say "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger," it's cowards who give up and as we continue living we have no other choice but to use that strength to face the new challenges that will come with life.
In our lives nothing is a waste of time, we always learn something from what we live whether it's positive or negative.
As indicated earlier this month, as we grow, new features will come in to play.
The latest feature added is the "Pick of the Week" feature, located on the right side of your screen (where everything seemingly is) below the subscriptions buttons, but above the thesaurus.
Choices include all post of the last seven days, but that is subject to change. How you ask? Well, I was contemplating only choosing one from each author who submitted anything that week. The author will be asked which one they would like to make it to the poll--but that's just a suggestion.
As always, I am open to anything and everything you're willing to suggest, so don't hesitate.
Finally, it is worth noting that you can only vote one time. As we grow, the poll will become more competitive and hopefully, more rewarding. Enjoy!
I loved my mother. I needed to protect her from anything and everything—to show her the love and appreciation that she was missing.
People don’t see how disrespectful that is. As if she can’t get on without you. Like she didn’t survive without you—get over yourself. Women are stronger than men, they are completely capable of self-sufficiency—the ones who aren’t, never got the right chance to be.
We grew up poor, so naturally I appreciated what others might see as small things. Things that people might usually take for granted. At 11-years-old, my favorite toy was a Fisher-Price tape recorder that I got for Christmas. I didn’t have any replacement tapes, so I just recorded over old recordings on the same tape.
All of the recordings were pretty much the same.
The average workday is 9AM-5PM, sometimes overtime, sometimes a little later, or a little earlier.
My father left the house everyday before 6 AM. My baby sister had to be at day care at about 8, and I had to be at school before 8:45, so did my brother, and it seemed like my sister went to high school at whatever time she wanted. Most of the time, we were all home by 5 PM. 7PM on late days.
My father would arrive at 12AM the earliest, and there were times where he wouldn’t twist his keys in the door until 3 AM.
You could always tell when Fernando was about to stumble through that door—sort of like a sixth sense. The jingle of the keys was as unique as a fingerprint. But there wasn’t anything physically unique with the keys—we just knew that it was him. On the really late nights, he’d usually drop his keys on the hallway floor before inserting one to unlock the bottom lock.
Sometimes, we’d hear him burp or hum or sing his favorite tunes from the ‘70s—as if everything was all good, as if he was a happy drunk…
Fernando was from a happy drinker. He could have had the best night out with the boys, or the strippers or hookers—whoever he was with, but as soon as he walked through the brick-red door of 311 W17th St., he’d flip like a light switch—just like that. Angry, upset, raging—on fire…and for what? At the time, I couldn’t understand why he was so upset, and even if I did, that is no justification for what he did to our lives.
I can’t exactly recall the first night he came home late, but I remember the countless nights that we couldn’t sleep, or were woken up by his shit. Three in the morning…coming home angry and taking it out on my mother—constant verbal abuse. Non-stop. He would violently scream at her, at 3 AM about a hot plate of food would have been prepared for him had he been home at the right time.
The selfish motherfucker couldn’t quite grasp what he was doing wrong—what he was doing to us. All he saw, all he understood is what she didn’t do. He was impossible to satisfy, and I knew it was only a matter of time before his verbal abuse turned physical.
I knew I couldn’t physically beat him up the way I wanted to, so I took…alternate routes. To make matters worse, he usually had sober days on the weekend, in which he would try to talk to us, or make us breakfast and lunch—as if all was forgotten—or never happened. He couldn’t understand that it just made us despise him more.
My blood boiled because of this sorry excuse of a man who would smile in our faces during the weekends, but disappear during the weekdays. Just coming home to sleep, scream, and occasionally beat us whenever we decided to stand up to him.
I was physically helpless against him, but I knew I could do other things that would hurt him. At 11, my older brother was in high school, my sister just started college, and my younger sister was occupied by after school programs. Almost every weekday, I was home alone for a couple of hours, at least, and I rarely watched TV. It gave me ample time and opportunity to snoop around the house.
I found many things, sensitive documents, condoms, and stashes of cash. I remember the first time I found anything, I was in his room. In his top drawer was a steel-gray safe box. It was hard to get into without taking out the socks, underwear, army knife, and a few condoms. The first time, with sweaty palms, it was enough to just discover that I found something secret—something difficultly placed in the drawer for a reason—I fled the room.
It wasn’t enough.
The very next day—Tuesday, I went back. This time, I didn’t hesitate. I went right for the safe box, moved everything out of the way and pulled it out—it was locked. I didn’t want to turn back, and I know the key had to be in here somewhere so I went through the rest of his drawers and his closet. I also went through his shoe boxes—one was hard to reach for me. I was a short preteen—I struggled to reach the top box, I stood on the ill-balanced tip of my toes.
I had to dodge an avalanche of boxes—one of which had a bunch of 20-dollar bills in them, at least 50 of them. I picked them up as fast and orderly as possible, and took a “finder’s fee” of about $60. I created a monster.
I didn’t tell anyone—not about the safe or the shoebox filled with enough money to buy 100 Nikes. Not a soul, not my brothers or sisters, not my closest friends. Probably because I planned to take more…and I did.
But the money wasn't the only item that I came across. I finally found the key to that safe box, he must have left it in one of his pants pockets in the laundry basket. He kept that key and a few others separate from the keys that he carried around with him daily, I guess. The silver key for the silver box, I found a silver .22 caliber pistol, and a silver Smith & Wesson army knife.
Sometimes we make mistakes perhaps for fun, for the lack of love and attention from our partner, perhaps because with time we fall into a routine or just because we don’t love our partner anymore. My question is:
Would you forgive unfaithfulness?
Would it be possible for you to be happy knowing that the person whom you have never been unfaithful to,
The one who is supposed to love you and share those special moments just with you, didn’t care and failed you?
Would you trust this person again?
Do you think the anger, the jealousy, and the disappointment you feel now would let you be happy with this person again?
Do you think there is a valid reason for this person to be unfaithful to you?
Do you think it would be worthy to forgive and to forget?
Would you forget?
The truth is, when we cheat we jeopardize a lot of things that we shouldn’t risk for just a moment of fun. If that is the case then,
Where was the love that person was supposed to feel for you?
On the other hand, if it wasn't just for fun then we have more reason not to forgive. In my opinion, when a relationship is darkened by the cloud of unfaithfulness there is nothing else to look for.
We should turn the page and close that chapter of our lives. It's not worth forgiving someone who disrespected you that way, someone who hurt you and what is even worse, someone who didn’t think about you and the possibility of losing you.
Life is too short, give yourself the opportunity to find someone who is really willing to live for you. Someone who respects you and with whom you can live a pure love without anything that will ruin it. It is better to be alone than with the wrong person.
Writers, just a few things that need to be addressed (in no particular order of importance):
Initially, there were about seven writers invited to this tester version of a blog. Only members can write, and only about four of the seven, on a great day contribute on a semi-regular basis.
In response, there will be another group of writers invited--writers who I think would contribute.
The blog will stay available to view, but if/when these additional writers do contribute, I will close it completely to members only until we're ready to proceed to the next level.
However, even while it is closed, there will be an influx of writers invited periodically, the more people who are invited translate to people who write more--easily overriding those who don't.
Lastly, if you might know anyone interested--don't hesitate to get their e-mail addresses and have them invited.
2. As a new feature, I will be posting and/or e-mailing questions to writers, inviting anyone to write a response to it--as always anyway you want it, and post it directly to the blog.
Additionally, anyone is free to post/e-mail their own questions, inviting a response as well.
Usually, the writer who poses the question should stay out of answering it, but if need be--whether no one else answered to it, or the question is just that intriguing--by all means.
3. Lastly, it's important to emphasize that everything that was written about, be it new features or anything else will be done. You should do the same.
There is nothing like... The rush you get when you meet someone who shares all your interest. Someone who finishes your sentences, Someone who, while you speak, speaks over you and ends up saying the same thing you were going to say. The butterflies you feel when the phone rings and you see their name across the screen. When you get that phone call and instead of hearing "hi" you hear "I miss you babe how was your day" When no matter how busy their day is they take 2 minutes to call and ask about YOUR day. How you blush and get shy when you speak to your friends about them. The rush you get when they call to say they are on their way The feeling you get when they call to say they are outside The feeling you then get when you walk up to them and one simple tap kiss feels like you are in heaven. When the simple things make you feel like you are flying. Like just roaming the city holding hands, Sitting on a bench in a park not saying a word to each other Going to the movies and not even watching the movie Receiving a bouquet of pink roses because he knows they are your favorite without you ever telling him they were your favorite.
Just knowing that he listens to every word you say even when you think he isn't paying attention and then he agrees and says "yes babe because..." (and repeats everything you just said word for word.)
as time has gone by the Icy wall surrounDing my heart has began tO melt. my life didNt begin wiTh him and it definateLy dOesn't end without him.
its not easy putting yourself out there but iVe decidEd i will tell mY own stOry.
as most of yoU know by now yes i was hurt. however im over thAt part of my life. im oN a new journeY and as i said subconciously iM trying tO find something, im looking foR somEthing, i dont know what yet , but i know i dont have it, so im on the path of getting it.
there is nothing better than embracing your life and saying goodbye to what held you back all this time. i have lots of plans for this year.
Inspired by my sister, I read the wall, And the closet said "fear is stronger than love."
I took it in...a deep breath...gazed at the wall the gaze turned into a stare...a still, statue-like stare
A blank stare capable of freezing you...a daydream...a revelation
Fear is stronger than love...
Is that how you prefer it? Is that just the way it is?
Or is it a choice?
Are you afraid to love because you're afraid of heartbreak and heartache? Is your fear of failure stronger than your desire to love?
You fear the dark, you fear heights, you fear what you don't understand--you fear being misunderstood, you fear...fear--but you don't fear being feared--
That's power...that's another story.
You love innocence, you love nature, you love growth--progression...you love success--money, sex, drugs, music--they're all the same.
The pleasure they give you--the high--it's all the same...love is love, right?
Is fear just a characteristic, a trait of the weak? And love, of the passionate, of the creative?
Or are they just instinct? Human nature.
Nowadays, they want you to fear everything in the name of caution and awareness. But of course, you can fear and love simultaneously--they're cut from the same cloth.
Left arm, right arm--they're both arms--both part of the torso... both with the same functions, same core values...identical.
Love is fear overcome Fear is love undone... love never there
Or is--was it? And you didn't know, you passed it by--let it pass you...because of fear
I dont think anyone has ever really understood me. And maybe I even thrive off of that..
I dont even think my closest friends, mom, sis and my cousin, get me MOST of the time. "Its like they hear what I am saying but they're not feeling my words or my pain". I am like a puzzle that cant be put together.
I am the kind of person that just shuts off and shuts down instantly. It's like I will hold on and deal and then when the day finally comes, even I dont see it.. it just becomes what it is.
Some people never change and then others are always evolving...
Some people want the simple things and others are aiming for the grand prize.
Some are content with where they stand and others keep finding ways to get to the next thing.
I used to be the girl that lived for the moment. I never EVER cared about what people said, or even thought about me. I never gave away my heart, I always played with hearts. I was never the girl to take anything or anyone too seriously.
I think back and remember the days when i was wanted by many and i played with many hearts and minds. Until one comes along and drags you off your feet (yes not sweep you off your feet) and your whole life changes. For the worse.. it's rearly ever for the good.
I remember clubbing almost every weekend just to forget about the problems... countless times in VIP, endless pictures online so "they" can see that I'm doing just fine..
and that had been my life for awhile..
there comes a point where you finally just want to stop.
I lived the party girls life and im content with saying no more to that.
The only part I miss is the dress up part LOL
I dont regret anything... I am actually happy I got to be crazy for a while.
And yeah, every now and then I might decide to step out and remind everyone how I'm not an old lady LOL..
but my mind is somewhere else now.. subconciously im finding something, looking for something..
Nothing is impossible in life (everything comes at the right moment) nor is anybody smarter or more capable than anybody; God gave us the tools, is up to us to put them to work. Never give up on your personal goals, the harder it is to achieve them the more you will appreciate what will come as a result, and the prouder you would feel about yourself.
Be somebody’s role model, not anybody's disappointment!!!!
Why if love is supposed to be so beautiful, sometimes it makes us feel so horrible? Why if it is the best feeling in the world, sometimes it makes us feel the worst? Why if we want to live to love and to be loved, sometimes because of love we will like to die and even to kill? Why if love makes us see birds and butterflies everywhere, sometimes it turns us into monsters? Why if love can make us be so sweet, it can also make us be so bitter? And why if love makes us suffer so much, we want to fall in love all over again?
Why, why, why?????
Finally, it is better to fall in love or out of love?
Here we are. One day before the completion of the biggest underdog, history-making, era-defining victory in American history. But still, adversaries persistently try to undermine the historic event, citing the camaraderie of his ethnic background as the ONLY reason for Barack Obama’s victory.
That’s just silly.
Have they forgotten what kind of situation the United States is in?
Have they forgotten that we are in the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression?
Have they forgotten that we are STILL involved in an unjust war—which is the cause for several thousands of lives lost worldwide?
Have they forgotten that much of these consequences that are punishing the lives of plenty of families around the nation and world, are in large part due to our 43rd President of the United States of America?
Frankly, our situation is so bad, and our need for change so necessary, Elmer Fudd, would have won the election over Senator John McCain (R-AZ).
Have they forgotten that up until October, when Sen. McCain tried to disperse of his support and relationship with President Bush, he was a big-time partner of his, and should also be held partially responsible for leading into this crisis which was almost beyond repair?
‘Almost’ beyond repair would have evolved to 'certainly' beyond repair, had there been a different result on Nov. 4, 2008.
Luckily for us, the majority of voters (over seven-million of them) decided to look beyond President Obama’s ethnicity and his apparent partnership with the Blacks, and make the right choice for the good of the country we all love.
This probably could not have happened in any other country with the same history or past as the U.S., and we should all be thankful.
On a personal note, I never thought that I would live to see the day that a Black man was in the Oval Office as the Commander-In-Chief.
And if I did, I most definitely expected a different set of conditions.
I would have expected to see a completely unified country that elected the man based on who he is, what he can do for the country, and what he stands for—not race.
Maybe those expectations are a bit naïve.
Leading up to the election, I occasionally flipped through different news channels to get varying perspectives on what was about to go down.
SIDE NOTE: It’s important to realize that news corporations do have opinions. They can try to stay “objective” but that’s nothing more than a mission. What’s objective to them can be complete bias and nonsense to you and I, because perception is reality.
Anyway, I stopped by Fox News, and it seemed like my timing was perfect.
I don’t remember her name—she wasn’t part of the staff, she was a guest. She said, “95 percent of them will vote for him just because he’s black.”
On CNN, during their coverage leading up to Election Day, a woman was on “The Situation Room with Wolf Blitzer.” She was an advent supporter of Hillary Clinton, but when the Senator from New York didn’t win the democratic nomination, she supported the McCain-Palin ticket.
Regarding policies and almost everything they stand for, Clinton and McCain-Palin (especially Palin) are staunch opposites. In fact, with the exception that Palin is a woman, they are different in almost every way possible.
Her reasoning? Because she doesn’t trust our current President-elect.
Meanwhile, it was absolutely fine for her to say that she supported Hillary or even Palin because they’re women, and it’s a great symbol for women.
Excuse me miss, I forgot your name, but are you implying that Mr. Obama doesn’t represent a symbol of PROGRESS in America in the most extreme way possible?
Is that a good reason for Blacks to vote from him?
I digress.
Not to mention, so-called experts like Pat Buchanan, Bill O’Reilly, and Howard Stern, all known for their anti-urban/plain out racist remarks, all accuse Obama of close affiliation with domestic terrorism, and that’s just the beginning.
When our next President made his democratic-nominee acceptance speech, he gave a pound (hand shake, but with a closed fist) to his wife…it was labeled as a “terrorist fist bump” by one Fox News contributor. It is probably one of the best sound-bites ever. She even brought in a "body language expert!"
It seems like they all forgot simple statistics. In recent history, approximately 93 percent of Blacks vote for democrats—it’s that simple.
In fact, ever since FDR and the Civil Rights Era, blacks and democrats have gone together like peas and carrots.
It’s like they didn’t get the memo about what most right-wing stood for back then and still stand for now: abolishing particular economic and educational laws and programs that DIRECTLY affect blacks, other minorities, and people living in lower-income neighborhoods.
Affirmative action, welfare and other government assistance, and many other institutional actions in place made to benefit people who aren’t as privileged as they might be. Not everyone is born with a silver spoon. Sometimes we need assistance, a push, a mentor, and some sense of direction.
It’s also worth noting those who voted AGAINST Obama because he’s black, which were plenty. A few months ago, I was watching a video online and a middle-aged woman who seemingly lived in a rural community said that she doesn’t want Obama to win because she fears that “the Blacks will take over.” But we didn’t hear too much about that.
According to the 2005 US Census, Blacks only make up approximately 17 percent of the US population. Factor in babies and people who aren’t of voting age--how much of a difference does that really make?
I wanted validation that I wasn’t crazy, so I asked two college students and a 17-year-old who is politically involved about their perspectives.
Felicia, the 17-year-old said that they eyes of those who didn’t vote for Obama because of his race “are still shut. They don’t see that the world needs to change.” I asked her why she would have voted for Obama she added, that he gives hope to the urban youth and shows them that anything is possible.
Wendell Peterson, a Master’s Degree candidate at a university in upstate New York, said that he doesn’t see a problem with voting for a candidate based on race, the problem is ignorant votes. “Some people nowadays are not educated enough and are uninformed.”
Rokim Robinson, a 21-year-old Graduate student said, “Implying that blacks voted for Obama just because he’s black is implying that Blacks never voted before. Over 90 percent of Blacks are Democrats.” Robinson said that he isn’t surprised that people didn’t vote for him based on race, citing that there is still plenty of institutional and “under-the-radar” racism in America.
But opponents are persistent. As of Dec. 7, according to the Baltimore Sun, two lawyers, one from Pennsylvania, Philip Berg, and another from New Jersey, Leo C. Donofrio, “are pursuing lawsuits asserting that President-elect Barack Obama is ineligible to hold the office of president because he is not a "natural born citizen." Their claims were rejected in lower courts, but they have filed motions and appeals at the U.S. Supreme Court.”
Lawyers are supposed to be the smart ones! Do you see what desperation does!? For anyone to really be declared a “natural born citizen,” he or she has to be of Native American descent.
Whites have descended from Europe, and 99 percent of the population descend from all over the world—not the USA. That honor belongs to Native Americans.
But something tells me that that isn’t what they’re implying.
I am a critic. Not a professional one, just a critic.
It's not that I'm a cynic, it's just the fact that I believe that there is always room for improvement. But that does not mean that I am never satisfied.
There is nothing more satisfying than a good book, or a good flick--Jack Nicholson, Anthony Hopkins, Denzel Washington, and Spike Lee never seem to fail me, to the point of where my expectations are high whenever they bless the screen.
Movies that are biographical bore me--most of us fans know the story without the movie, so the movie is just a waste of time. But this wasn't the case in American Gangster, but that was rare--let me shorten this--I have no expectations for NOTORIOUS--which comes out tomorrow, 1/16.
American Gangster was biographical of Frank Lucas and the short lived Lucas Crime Family. Anyone can do research and know the story, but the movie--the movie was something different.
The performances by Denzel Washington, Russell Crowe, and especially Ruby Dee (Mama Lucas) were outstanding. And the language--the way that it was written--was phenomenal. It hit hard, had a great build--ideal, to say the least.
I was excited for American Gangster--gangster movies are the best kind--they always keep you on your toes, and there is no 'good guy-bad guy' typical theme--in most gangster films the so-called good guys wind up crooked and just as bad as the rest of us--a true reflection of real life.
But enough about that--I'm not as excited for NOTORIOUS, I'm not sure if I'm excited at all--which is why I'll be the film's biggest fan if it is indeed a modern marvel.
A lot of fans and some pundits are hyping it up, one artist even said that he sees it doing $50 M opening weekend. We all (well, most of us) know Biggie's story, and it is compelling--which makes the acting, writing, and delivery much more prominent.
With that, I have no expectations of the film--I'll just wait to see it...and I refuse to see it on opening weekend--I know better than that. Theatres will be mayhem, I anticipate fights and a bunch of rowdiness, so I'll just wait to go on a secluded rainy morning or something like that.
To close, I brought this up to some of my friends--the way that they are advertising the movie is great, it's ideal and they're doing everything right. On a personal note, they're doing such a good job, that people are screaming that BIG was/is the greatest rapper of all time--wait--the greatest rapper of all time?
I'm as objective as they come, I don't think that I have a bias, but if I do, I wouldn't mind being called on it, but there is no way that BIG is the G.O.A.T.. As aforementioned, his impact and influence cannot be denied, and we pay homage, and we'll all pay homage and remember him for as long as music exists, but the greatest of all time?
No.
Impact and influence don't translate to being the GOAT--Jackie Robinson was arguably the most influential athlete, but does that make him the GOAT? No, Willie Mays is still better.
He came out with two albums, and unfortunately we would never know how his career would have progressed if he were still here, so we can't FAIRLY call him the GOAT. I can name one other Brooklynite and two other rappers who I would put above him without any second thoughts.
He put the east coast back on the map and influenced every NY rapper in the game after or during his era. I pay homage, but I'm not fooled by the hype and the absurd.
It kills her inside But she smiles with deep pride They don't know, what she feels inside They try to make her open her eyes
Her heart has froze She still loves him though Her soul turned cold And she doesn't know Will she love again Or stay alone
They will never know They will never know She will never let it show As she continues to smile with deep pride No one. Will. Ever. Know. What lies...behind her eyes.
Well Oh Well, Here I am Going Phishing Again
-
In the year since my novel *Finding Filomena*
was published, I’ve received far-too-many invitations from would-be book
and movie promoters, all of whom want...
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